We made a lot of phone calls to our partners. Honey, honey, or, my personal favorite pudding bag. They are often called our other half. But one of the most common phrases you hear, usually in someone's pledge, is that their partner is their best friend.
It goes further. Think about who you turn to in times of need or distress. Your spouse is a person. Your best friend is another. Now think about the time your spouse might have, inadvertently creating the time that is needed. Who do you turn to now? Your best friend.
By making your chubby dating partner your only good friend, you are getting rid of a very important support system. While we like to think that our love for our partner is unconditional, romantic relationships can rise and fall. They have been through much more than the usual tests of friendship. If your best friend is not your fat dating partner, then your best friend will not live with you. They won't share your bed. You may not see them every day. You can't raise the kids together. The stress of all this is not your friendship. Your best friend doesn't have to worry about your finances or your health. Your best friend may care about both, but your life won't be affected by either.
When your BBW hookup dating partner has problems and you cut them off, intentionally or not, your support system goes away. We don't like to think about when things get difficult in a relationship. We love to think about those friendly moments on instagram when you smile and look so in love. But Instagram is full of friendly moments, not deeper issues. We all have relationship problems in some way. Not having friends around to help us can lead to a lot of loneliness, not to mention the fear of ending a relationship because you believe you'll be really lonely.
So shouldn't you be friends with your spouse? Of course not. You should definitely be friends, but let's face it, in a relationship, the word "friend" is different from the Platonic word for "friend." These relationships have very different needs and fulfill very different parts of our lives.
While you may turn to your best friend for help on many things, there are other needs that only your spouse can fulfill. In this way, a curvy dating partner can truly be like the other half. You don't want your best friend to take care of you when you're sick. You don't expect them to help you deal with grief or loss. You don't expect them to hold you or touch you the way you want them to. You don't expect too much from your spouse. Because your life and your partner's are intertwined, your best friend's is not.
It's good to want to be on good terms with your spouse, but it's not appropriate to call them friends. You don't treat your friends like your BBW dating partner and vice versa. In order to be happier, healthier, and grow more in our lives, we need other relationships and support systems.